


Not how we planned our future

by Blue_Pen



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Don’t copy to another site, F/M, Families of Choice, Family Feels, Family Issues, Gen, Grieving, Half of them are a bit broken, Heartbreak, I love all of them, Loss, Stark's aren't perfect, but they are trying, loving family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-25
Updated: 2019-05-25
Packaged: 2020-03-17 08:27:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18961558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Pen/pseuds/Blue_Pen
Summary: My modern take on how the Stark family would form in semi-modern setting. It's a bit bittersweet, because they are lovely people, but they made mistakes - and sometimes bad things just happen to good people. But, as it is with Starks - there always is room for hope.





	Not how we planned our future

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fanfic I wrote in english.  
> So it isn't my usual language, and not my usual fandom, but I had many feels about second chances and how they deserved it, but many of them wouldn't got. So in my modern AU Lyanna lives (and is a student), well, Ned's brother and parents died (sorry), but all the other Starks (and Stark wards) are alive, and some of them gone through their personal tragedies, but can hope for the future they deserve.  
> So maybe I will write more, something sweeter and more lighthearted, but for now this is grieving and imperfect family life, but there is love, always love.

It was a springtime when Ned first asked Catelyn on a date. He was shy and unsure, because she was older, beautiful, and she went on a date with his brother once - before the accident. He wasn't sure what it could meant for them.  
Catelyn was scared, but stood tall and proud, and asked him for a time to think. He gave her time and stayed her friend, not expecting anything.  
They were outside, reading, when she decided to stop being afraid and said yes. (But she wondered what would happen in a different world, because it felt like she betrayed Brandon, and thinking that felt like betraying Ned). 

They went on dates, and it never was easy.  
Not with Ned taking care of both his siblings and family buisness. Not with Cat always being under scrutiny from said siblings (because she was supposed to be Brandons maybe not so long ago, and now she was supposed to be Ned's). Not with how her family taught her to be proper, polite, quiet and unmoved, giving her expectations and rules much more freely than praise and affection - and Stark's were just and wild, with Lyanna and Benjen doing as they pleased and being loved for it.  
Catelyn tried to be loving and supportive, and pretended not to hear whispers that she's frigid, fake and unfeeling, that she's here for their money, or titles, or treats Ned as a replacement Brandon.  
Stark's had much more to grieve than her, and she was taught to be quiet, so she gave them their space.

Ned proposed to her in the winter. She said yes, and was given the most beautiful ring, magical wedding, loving husband and support from family and friends - old and new alike. She was so happy and hopeful, and she almost didn't cry from the guilt of how bittersweet it was.  
Few months later Robb was born and it was like almost all her dreams (her new dreams) came true one after the other. Her son was beautiful and sweet, and Ned was a good father, like she knew he would be.  
Then Lyanna became pregnant, wouldn't tell whose it was („He's married” she said, „I can't do this to him, I love him”), and Ned promised they would take care of her baby, so she would be able to go to college. He never asked, he just stated it like it was obvious, a fact - and it wasn't like Catelyn would like to leave them without help, but her dreams of having something that was just theirs shattered once again, and it would be nice to have at least illusion of the choice.  
(It was easier when both boys were little, even if they cried all the time, and she didn't have time to sleep. It became worse when little Jon - clueless thing he was, started copying Robb in calling Ned his dad, and Catelyn stayed just Cat, and the ladies in the preschool started to look at her with the pity in their eyes).  
She knew it wasn't malice, but for Jon it was obvious he had his mommy, and his and Robb's „dad”, and Robb's Cat, and she couldn't help how she felt when the rumors were becoming worse and worse. 

Three years after Jon, Sansa was born. Catelyn's dreamed daughter - so precious, loving, and looking so, so fragile. Robb called himself her protector from the minute he laid his eyes on her, kissing her little head clumsily, and giving in to her whims the quickest when she was growing.  
Jon was more wary of the little girl who was making so much noise, and was getting all the attention and smiles that were so sparse for him. She looked like she could break if he hold her, and started to cry immediately after he first saw her.  
„They have new baby cus girls are less trouble, so now they go rid of you” said kid in preschool, so Jon started to make himself invisible, hoping they will forget about him and how much trouble he was, and will let him stay. He never came close to Sansa, because Catelyn always seemed to watch them, and even if she smiled at his tries to be good, it never was the smile Robb got, and Jon couldn't figure what he did wrong.  
Baby Sansa was cheerful and gave her affection freely, but quickly she figured Jon never was keen on playing with her, and that mommy becomes really quiet when he is in the room - and mommy is someone who was always right, so Sansa stopped trying. 

Sansa was just learning to speak in sentences when Arya was born, and their family home became too full, and Cat was too tired, and Ned was working too much, and it became harder and harder to keep an eye on everything all the time.  
Sansa was almost glued to Robb's side, so Catelyn asked Jon - softer and quieter than she usually addressed him - if he would like to learn to have an eye on Arya. He wanted to, even if he was scared and never knew what to do and how to act around people, but all he had to do was to keep her company. And he must have done something right, 'cause baby stopped crying when he talked to her, even if he only told her about his preschool she never saw.  
And Catelyn smiled at him when she saw them interacting, and it didn't seem artificial or pained. So if Sansa got Robb for protector, maybe Jon was allowed to be Arya's, and play with her - if only he would manage to keep Cat smile, so so she wouldn't think to take Arya from him. 

Only a year later they had a baby boy, and they called him Brandon, after Ned's brother and Catelyn's maybe, and at this point their tears weren't of grief but of joy. Still, it felt heavy sometimes, and everyone started to call him Bran, by some quiet understanding (later he gets told of his amazing uncle, who he didn't get chance to meet, but whose name lives in him, but then they let him live without their loss). 

Robb was eight when he learned that his friend, Theon, was beaten by his father so much, that he ended up in hospital - and Theon's father ended up taken away from his family. The Stark's visited him, and he was all alone, his oldest brother living on his own, his uncle agreeing to take his two older siblings, but not more, and Theon, the youngest, the weakest (the family disappointment) was waiting for his fate to be decided. Robb readily promised that his family will want Theon - they wanted Jon, so why not Theon too?  
Ned was patient, and Catelyn was pale, but it was little Sansa who melted their hearts, when she started crying after hearing that no one loves Theon now (Sansa loves love, and her family is bestest of bests, so how they could leave someone unloved?).  
Cat and Ned both saw how the kid looked on hospital bed, how pained and weak, but still trying to distract Sansa from crying with bad jokes, and how the boys didn't want to leave him in the hospital („He's all alone, mom, and we can do a sleepover here”). And Catelyn sighs (she always had a problem with saying „no” to her children) and Ned says („We already bought a bigger home anyway, so what's one kid more in it?”). 

So they fought for Theon to stay with them, and it wasn't easy, but his uncle and brother agreed, and Stark's were rich and respected in the community, so Theon's got his own bedroom in the new Stark household. And it wasn't easy after that too, 'cause he seemed to repeat only „My father will come back for me” to almost anything. When they came to take him to their home, when they asked him what color he would like his curtains („Not mine, I'm coming home soon”), when they asked if he wanted ice cream. And Catelyn started to look even sadder and more tired, but Theon seemed less shy with her than Ned, so she was sitting with him, and trying to coax some sort of answer from him. 

The youngest born into their family was Rickon, and their home, lives, and hearts seemed full already, but at this point no one among their families or friends even asked how they want to do it. („Stark's have another kid, what's for dinner?”).  
Even if no one seemed to question them anymore, they thought about it anyway. Ned employed more people who would help him with buisness, so the kids wouldn't see more of their nanny than of their father (they long ago gave up on the notion they don't need house help). When he told Cat the news, she smiled at him and it looked hopeful finally.  
Starks household was filled with laughter. And it wasn't how any of them would have planned it, but when even Theon's eyes lighted up when he saw his foster brother, they knew that it all will be alright.

**Author's Note:**

> I had in mind fluff about mending each other by family, but it seems that I can't write mending without breaking. So I ended with just breaking for now, with many ideas for more fluffy pieces, but right now I wasn't sure if my writing is even passable in english, so I'm posting this.  
> I hope you liked it.


End file.
